Critique: “Lasting legacy of Diana ” Elephant conservationist shares on loss and friendships forged”

By Iylia Marsya Iskandar

Article by: Elena Koshy, New Straits Times

Elena Koshy narrated a human-interest feature story that describes the relationship of an elephant specialist, Dr. Nurzhafarina Othman with elephants and specifically Diana, the elephant that she has been observing for a year and the drive that has got her to become involved in the field with the largest living land animals.

Generally, the writer employs block writing where topics are written continuously throughout the article so readers are able to read it naturally and simply, bringing the readers in a step-by step journey until the ending.

Overall, the article is compelling, suitable for an audience of all ages and is in line with the feature writing concepts and techniques.

The author started the article with a hook, creating an element of suspense and quoting the informant, œSHE’S dead. Even though it started with a mere two words, the lead left an impact that attracted readers to read the rest of the article.

Elena conveyed a sense of urgency by foreshadowing a problem by bringing up the death of an elephant in the lead. Following the concepts of feature writing, Elena then provides a flashback to set the focus of the article. These methods have allowed the readers to anticipate the flow of the article thus enticed readers to read on the background story of the problem. The story read:

It’s the same elephant she named œDiana in honour of her friend, Dr Diana Angeles Ramirez Salvidar, who passed away suddenly two years ago.

œHow do you cope with this sense of loss¦ again? she asks bleakly.

The article is classified as a feature article as it modified the inverted pyramid. Instead of going for the œOnce upon a time approach, the writer first created suspense and unfold the historical background of the specialist in the second-half of the article.

The story unfolds topically with different headings, œPlight of Elephants, œDianas Journey and œFarinas Journey. The method that was used by the writer will pique the readers interest as it is a refreshing way to read a story, yet the writer still fulfilled the promise that she foreshadowed in the introduction, which is a story on the death of Diana and the specialist that had been supporting her.   

Carefully, the author unfolded several elements of the story by thoroughly describing each and every feeling the informant faced. In talking about death of elephants and grief, the author utilised you-language, bringing the examples close to the readers with talking about death of loved ones. This writing technique evokes the readers emotions and propels them to read more as readers will reflect and relate with the article.

The writer wrote:

There’s no easy way to comprehend grief. Death reveals the fault-lines in those who are left behind, even the deepest, most hidden ones. If you know about loss, you know about family and friends, and about love, survival, resilience and strength. If you know about loss, you know about life. In trying to preserve life, Farina (as she’s fondly known) has become well acquainted with the tragedy of death.

She’s never forgotten Ramirez.

Interestingly, the writer painted a vivid picture by describing the elephants itself and bringing the mammal to life. Meticulously, the writers word usage is able to give readers an in-depth visualisation of the story. The descriptions used will allow the readers to have a humanistic view of the characters in the story and induce empathy in their minds.

The news read:

œThe largest of all land beasts, elephants are thundering, trumpeting monuments to the wonder of evolution. From the tip of that distinctive trunk with its 100,000 dextrous muscles; to their outsized ears that flap the heat away; to the complex matriarchal societies and the mourning of their dead; these lumbering creatures used to roam freely in wide expanses of wilderness across the globe. Yet today, these great nomads are restricted to ever-decreasing pockets of land¦

On top of that, the writer maximised humanising the story by using quotations to change the pace of the story, creating a more familiar voice in the article. Furthermore, these quotations are also used as several peaks to keep the readers excited to read the next section of the story.

In the article, the writer wrote:

She was devastated. œI remember having questions running through my mind the whole day. What if I’d acted faster? What if I’d decided to monitor her the day she died? Would she be alive now?” she asks, crestfallen. “I felt I was losing a friend all over again.

The writer then provides valleys of resolution throughout the next section of the article. This technique allows readers to stay captivated and interested to read on instead of just skimming through the article. The little peaks and resolutions acted as an element of catharsis for the article and creating a sense of satisfaction for the readers.

Consistently, the writer amplified the ending by going in a full circle with the lead. One of the main concepts of feature writing is for the ending to echo with the lead. Successfully the writer echoed the lead, keeping the story tight and focused throughout the end.

The news read:

œConcludes Farina softly: œYou don’t forget those who have gone; you can never do that, and you shouldn’t worry that you’re going to. But you fold them, and their loss, into the new person you become; and maybe that, in the end, is the greatest tribute any of us can give anyone who has died¦.

Principally, the article is an entrancing illustration of a well-written feature article that follows the concept of feature writing and displays various techniques of keeping the interests of the readers alive.

The article is also followed by potent graphics to catch the attention of the readers. Thus, this is an exemplary feature article that is engrossing and educative on the subject matter.***  

(This article is written as part of individual assignment series for Feature Writing class)

Leave a Reply