“Will you let them go?”

By Mohammad Saifullah

Parents are the Blessings and Rahmah (mercy) from Allah SWT. The Creator made them for us as well-wishers and guidance. They pour all their all efforts to make us useful for this world as we can live our life properly.

Throughout their life, they spent almost all the time for their children, they make their day with engaged working and change their night a day only to make our future bright.

One day, our parents will lose their independence and become dependent on us. They won’t be able to work, to climb stairs, or to drive, or maybe even to change their own clothes or feed themselves.

As painful as thinking about this might be, we need to prepare to help them to be comfortable and safe in their last stages of their lives.

Going back to our childhood, we were the same as our parents are now in their ageing. There were no ones else, but they to help us, to show us the right way. They were the only people who accompany us. It was a moment during our amateur days when we were totally dependent upon our parents.

The relations with them was perfect that make us today to think of it.

It’s very hard to feel that one day they will become children as we were. The ageing and the stress of old ages will make them dependent again.

They may not go outside without one’s help and there will be no persons to accompany them, besides, no one would care to read their feelings. That is the moment we should take care of them and it is the most challenging task for us.

Nowadays, we are passing a moment where no one cares others if it is not necessary. The relationship becomes more passive than before. We are engaged with our own business and making our life selfish.

If we think, one day we will have a situation as our ageing parents passing through, it will make us think more.

The importance of a firm relationship with our parents is badly necessary for us when they are in ageing situation. They need someone to talk to, there must be someone to please them by a good company.

Experts say a person who is passing the ageing stage needs one to accompany him or her and it works as a medication. It can make them not to be alone.

Visiting our parents often and bringing something they like can make their day happy. I remember my childhood when my father used to bring me popcorn every day because I liked it. No one can describe the feeling we get at that time.

However, a friendly joke and a small complement also works as a psychological medication for ageing people. Moving hands on their head and asking what they like to do is necessary for us to please them.

How much we can do that? And if we cannot do these we are not fulfilling our responsibility towards them.

Thinking truly, everyone must go one day. By following this, are we prepared to let our parents leave us? Though, it is very painful and a weird question, but it is having a deep meaning for us.

According to Al Qur’an; “Every soul will taste death. And We test you with evil and with good as trial, and to Us, you will be returned.” (21:35)

Whatever hard and unrecovered sickness they suffer we don’t want our parents to leave us, it’s a love and passion to serve them. The creator made us with a relation we do not want to let them go. No one wishes to let them leave though their parents are passing an unrecovered situation.

It is a feeling we cannot express and it does not matter, whether it’s love or universal norms of mankind.

One of my friends, Afroza Jahan Khan, was recalling her past about her late mother, the feelings were very heart touching.

She shared. “I’m badly missing you, Mom. No one could wake up, to serve you before me when you asked for. I have never thought I could live one day without you. I often told you I will go along you while you asked me how will I live if you die?”

“You were passing your days in bad condition and one day you asked me what is this in the sky? Believe me, there was nothing and I cried a lot by embracing you. That day I could realise you are going and you have gone one day but I was not prepared to leave you!”

Here is another, He is my Facebook friend who posted on his wall about his hospitalised father saying: “I know how much you have gone through dad, and I’m sorry if you have to suffer a lot of pain lately. Don’t worry, I will never leave your side so just call me if you ever need a hug. I love you dad, please get well soon!”

My lecturer used to share with us about his mother who is passing her ageing. He said parents are the blessings from the creator, when they die one of the doors of Rahmah is closed for you. “It is very tough to think they are going to leave, but will you let them go?” ***

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